hanging out with science fiction fans on your own dime.
The quote of the day:
"What's magical realism?"
"Fantasy written in Spanish."
We got up, connected with Ceej and Zink, and headed over to the Sheraton for breakfast, because Darin wanted something involving seafood for breakfast and the guidebook mentioned that the Sheraton served both seafood and breakfast. Unfortunately, as it turned out they don't do both at the same time, and we had a fairly uninspired breakfast buffet.
We went to the convention, registered, and headed to the Dealer Room, which as always is a mish-mash of the interesting, the commonplace, and the frightening. (And that's just the merchandise. Ba-da-bing.) Darin found some books he wanted, and I found the Tarot of Baseball, which has the suits Balls, Bats, Gloves, and Hats. Of course I bought it; what do you think?
Our first panel: Regular Folks as SF&F Characters, or "How can you write about proletarian protagonists and make it all come out as science fiction and fantasy?"
As a peasant out there in the audience, it's easy to observe the mistakes made by a panel and say, Aha, you are flawed and imperfect. I've tried to analyze what's gone wrong and figure out how I'd do it better. I'm not always sure this would help, but one important thing is be prepared, moderators especially. Write down some of the points you want the panel to hit, have a list of questions that will elicit informed discussion, be prepared to steer the conversation onto topical paths.
Here we had a moderator who boasted of being completely unprepared. It showed. Never, ever tell the audience you don't know what you're doing--retain the suspense, let them figure it out.
One author said that all of her characters knew nothing because she herself knew nothing. In fact, she mentioned more than once about how little she knew. Advice to future panel members: be lively, be upbeat, be involved. This woman not only didn't sell me her books, she made me actively decide never to buy them, should I ever run across them.
Connie Willis was, as always, worth the price of admission, and she stayed on topic.
Ceej and I were rather annoyed by the lack of preparation on the part of the moderator or anyone else on the panel on the evolution of characters not only in science fiction but in fiction in general: for example, for thousands of years the only main characters in fiction were princes and kings, not proles. The panel members also confused the concepts of having high-born or famous protagonists and having protagonists who have no weaknesses or problems, as though they were one and the same. (Tell that to Hamlet.)
I found it interesting that all the examples taken to illustrate their points were taken from Film and TV, which is now our common literature, even at at science fiction convention. Talking about film gave Connie Willis a chance to talk a bit about Harrison Ford as well, which as any Connie Willis fan knows she will do at the drop of a hat.
At one point the moderator did use an example from one of her own books, which a)no one had ever heard of and b)made no sense even as she was giving it. (Something about a frog becoming a sidekick to the heroine, and why he had to be gay.)
Much of the discussion was taken up describing the needs of stories in general. The panelists couldn't assume any knowledge of dramatic imperative on the part of the audience, so the basic tenet of "make things hard on the hero" had to be explained. Oy.
We went to Nate's and Leon's for lunch. I had a grilled cheese on challah bread. Pretty darn tasty.
The highlight of the afternoon was the Liars' Panel. This panel got started because Terry Nation got tired of being asked the question, "How did you come up with the Daleks?" He wanted to answer, "On the afternoon of August 6, 1952, they landed in my backyard and took me away with them."
Authors get asked stupid questions like this all the time. "Where do you get your ideas?" (From the secret ideas mailing list, from a little store in Kansas, from...)
Liars' Panel member Joe Haldeman gets asked all the time, "Did your experiences in Viet Nam influence your writing of The Forever War?" So the panel started with this question, and Haldeman answered that he hadn't even heard of the Viet Nam war while he was in graduate school, but then he read some books on it and thought maybe he could incorporate some of the things he read about in his novel.
The best participants in the panel were Robert Silverberg and Connie Willis, both of whom are very funny. The other two were Joe Haldeman and Pat Cadigan, who were less funny but still good participants.
The problem (as always, I've noticed) is the audience participation portion of the program. People kept asking "wacky" questions, which were not wacky or funny or, often, coherent. Many audience members who asked questions didn't want to accept the lesser role as straight man, whereas straight questions--"Do you always base your characters on real-life friends and relatives?" might have been a good question--work much better.
For example: "What's your favorite movie made of your work?"
Or: "I have a great idea for a book."
It's a good idea for a panel. I hope they continue it.
Ceej met up with a whole bunch of friends and acquaintances (primarily but not solely of the Clarion variety) at Worldcon, so she kept joining them for large group get-togethers and Darin and I kept tagging along. (Seems to be the way things work at conventions anyhow.)
We went to a Chinese restaurant in a nice neighborhood up Charles Street. (I think it was Charles, at any rate.) All Chinese restaurants on the Eastern seaboard have this peculiar habit of putting a list of Polynesian drinks on the first page of their menus. If you're ever lost and want to orient yourself quickly (no pun intended), go to a Chinese restaurant and find out if the words "mai tai" appear on the first page.
Dinner was great, although as per usual in any group dinner over 1 person, several diners were unhappy that the bill was split evenly 18 ways. "But I didn't have anything to drink!" Yes, and Darin and I didn't have anything to drink, and Ceej and David had one meal between the two of them, and you don't see any of us complaining about subsidizing your meal, do you? I just want to hit some people and say, "Hey, you're not happy about doing it this way, don't eat in large groups of people." Or be prepared to wait for half an hour while we figure out each and every person's portion of the bill.
What really burns me is when diners decide, "Well, I didn't eat that much, so I'm not paying that much." Sticking everyone else with making up the difference.
Darin and I took a taxi back to the convention center for the J. Michael Straczynski Q & A. This was almost cancelled, as JMS came down with pneumonia and couldn't attend the conference. (Really, really bumming out Darin, as you might imagine.) But the wonders of technology prevailed and a phone hookup was put together, so that JMS could answer questions from the audience.
Most of the questions smacked of fawning adoration--that is, they weren't questions at all, but comments of the "Joe, we love you and you're the Great Maker and everything you do is perfect" variety.
Despite the audience's unwillingness to ask their questions and step aside--I'm noticing repetitious behavior here; this is not your moment in the sun, people--Joe managed to squeak and cough out a few interesting tidbits, such as the following: One of the big plot arcs for Season 5 was going to be that Ivanova fell in love with Byron and Lyta would become one of his followers and suffer unrequited love. Of course, this makes so much more sense than having Lyta fall in love with him--the repetition of having a guy with long hair and a British accent makes more sense if Ivanova's just lost someone. And a love interest for Ivanova as Commander of the Station is more intriguing than a "telepath sewing circle," as Darin puts it.
As Joe warmed up to his topic, I could hear him sounding better--the more excited he got, the less he coughed. Toward the end he tired, and the Q&A ended after just an hour and fifteen minutes.
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Copyright 1998 Diane Patterson
Send comments and questions to diane@spies.com